Mey Deras | ROOTED Biblical Counseling Services

by Mey Deras | Est. Reading Time 6 mins.

You’ve heard these words often if you’ve been in church for any amount of time:
“God doesn’t like complaints. Be joyful.”
“If you feel peace, it’s from the Lord.”

But if you’re honest, sometimes those phrases feel… confusing. Because what do peace and joy actually mean?
Are they emotions?
Are they choices?
Are they just mysterious ways in which the Holy Spirit operates but we’re not supposed to understand?

Recently, my husband was appointed as the lead pastor of a small church. It’s two hours away from where we now live, serve, and work.
We love our current church family. We love the ministry God has built with our Pastors. And this new assignment?
It feels bigger than us.
It feels uncomfortable.
And if I’m honest… it feels a little scary.

When big shifts like this come, my mind used to run wild:

¿What are we going to do?
¿Are we going to have enough money to move?
¿Why do we have to start all over again?!

Every time we packed boxes and moved houses in the past, I carried uncertainty in my chest and a tightness in my stomach. My thoughts would race at night, trying to figure everything out.

But here’s what God keeps teaching me:
Peace isn’t the absence of fear.
Peace is trusting God’s character while your heart races.
Peace looks like obedience, even when your feelings lag behind (they’ll catch up eventually.)

And joy?
Joy shows up when your heart remembers who God is, even on the days when absolutely nothing feels settled.

This season is stretching us. But it’s also becoming the place where God is teaching me (again) what peace and joy really are. And I can honestly say, this joy and peace I’m experiencing is supernatural, beyond a fleeting emotion. Glory be to his name!

Peace and Joy Don’t Start With You

Most people think peace and joy come from things going right:

• when you’re an independent single woman
• when the kids behave
• when your marriage is steady
• when you finally rest
• when the stress goes away
• when you find a spouse

But Biblically, peace and joy don’t start with circumstances.
They start with God.

“In Your presence there is fullness of joy.”
Psalm 16:11

“The God of peace will be with you.”
Philippians 4:9

Peace and Joy Start in the Heart, Not in the Feelings

This is where many women get stuck. Peace doesn’t always feel like calm. Joy doesn’t always feel like happiness.

Your emotions may be in high alert.
Your heart may be hurting.
Your mind may be racing.

And yet, you can still have real peace and real joy, because:

• Peace is a settled trust in God’s care.
• Joy is a deep gladness because you belong to Him.

They live deeper than your emotions, they live in your heart, your inner being. Which is the place where you think, trust, and choose. (Notice the difference of understanding what the heart is according to Scripture.)

“You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on You.”
Isaiah 26:3

Peace and Joy Grow as You Trust God, Not as Life Gets Easier

Peace and joy don’t grow when life becomes easy. They grow when your trust in God becomes deeper.

• When you learn to pray instead of panic
• When you remember God’s faithfulness
• When you obey His Word in small steps
• When you stop trying to control everything
• When you rest in His promises

This is why Paul could say:

“Sorrowful, yet always rejoicing.”
2 Corinthians 6:10

Joy was available even in grief because it came from God, not ease and comfort.

Peace and Joy Begin with Salvation

Before you can have peace from God, you need peace with God.

“Since we have been justified by faith, we have peace with God.”
Romans 5:1

When you belong to Christ:

• You are no longer God’s enemy
• You are no longer alone
• Your sin is forgiven
• Your life is held secure
• God calls you His daughter

From that new relationship grows:

• Peace, because you are safe in Him
• Joy, because you are loved by Him

Peace and Joy Show Up in Your Choices Before They Show Up in Your Feelings

Peace and joy first shape your:

• Thoughts → what you believe about God
• Will → the choices you make
• Actions → how you respond
• Emotions usually come last.

So don’t judge your spiritual health by how you feel. Judge it by where your heart is leaning. Are you leaning into God? Or into your fears? Are you trusting His character? Or your own strength?That’s where peace and joy start.

So What Are Peace and Joy Really?

Peace:

A settled, steady heart because God is with you, God is for you, and God is in control.

Joy:

A deep gladness that comes from knowing God, loving Him, and trusting His work in your life, even on hard days.

These are not shallow feelings. They are deep roots planted by the Holy Spirit.

“The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace…”
Galatians 5:22

At the end of the day, peace and joy aren’t rewards for having a good life. They are gifts from a perfect God. They grow in the heart that leans on Him, trusts His character, and remembers His goodness, even in hard seasons. When your eyes return to who God is, not what you feel, peace settles, joy deepens, and gladness quietly rises. God hasn’t changed, and that’s why your heart can rest.

As we walk through this transition: new church, new community, new assignment. I find myself coming back to a simple truth:

Peace and joy don’t come from certainty.
They come from a faithful God.

We’re choosing to obey God rather than follow fear.
We’re choosing to trust His character more than our own comfort.
And we’re choosing to believe that the same God who calls us is the God who carries us.

At the end of the day, this isn’t about feeling brave. It’s about believing God is who He says He is.

So if you’re facing a shift of your own…
a move, a decision, a loss, a new beginning…
remember this:

Peace is not a feeling you wait for.
Peace is a Person you walk with.

And joy? Joy rises when your heart remembers that God is with you, for you, and already ahead of you.

He is faithful, and He will carry you too.

Reflection Questions

1. Where am I trying to find peace outside of God?
2. What truth about God do I need to hold onto today?
3. What small act of trust can I choose this week?